Tuesday, September 19, 2006

Sorry America, I am Beset with the Plague of CTS!

Dear America,
Please attribute my recent dirth of posts to the liberal plague of Carpal Tunnel Syndrome. I can not find much to indicate it from his Wikipedia entry but I am almost positive that the qwerty keyboard must have been the work of communists. But there is a certain guilt by association of its adoption by the subversive socialist fifth element that became the press beginning in the first part of the Twentieth Century. So lets look a little deeper.

Christopher Sholes, Samuel W. Soule, and Carlos Glidden patented the QWERTY keyboard. Obviously of Eastern European origin or descent, just like the Communists! When the leftists figured how much easier it would be for the liberal media of the day to churn out more liberal lies, they knew they were on to something. They sold their patent to fellow travelers, Densmore and Yost, who would later use their influence to infiltrate what amounted for a good part of our military-industrial complex of the day, the Remington Arms Company.

Tell me gentle readers, why would a bunch of typewriter makers of Eastern European descent have an interest in a rifle company? A rifle company that armed the American military for most of it's subsequent conflicts. It doesn't make sense then and it doesn't make sense now! Believe me, they had another agenda. Only now, more than a century later, is this sinister plot coming to fruition.

I suspect one of them foretold the eventual adoption of the necessity of keyboarding, probably in some sick satanic ritual, and they contrived to make it the most tedious way to input some words into a machine as possible. That is how liberals come up with most of their so called ideas.

But perhaps the worst thing about it was how it gets invented here in America and then gets bastardized by every conceivable interest group until, instead of the world having a unified tool that should have stayed in English, like science and air traffic control, it is no longer recognizable or useful for most of the world.

This was a perfect example of design by committee. The Central Committee no doubt. Thankfully, the latest generation of voice recognition software is getting better with the drawls. We won't need the socialists keyboards any more!

For exposing the Qwerty keyboard for the communist plot it was, your welcome America.

Your Humble servant,
Rob R. Baron ~ Esquire

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